Rascals - Chapter 12

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"Oh, I want that...and that...and that one over there!" Sam exclaimed, happily.

"Calm down. You're only getting...say, 200 dollars each to buy toys for. It should be more than enough!" O'Neill said, determinedly.

"200 dollars? That's nothing!" Sam looked incredulous he could even suggest it. "Do you know what a single Hellfire missile costs? 68,000 dollars! Toys are peanuts! We should have at least 5000 dollars each!"

"What's that gotta do with things? 500 dollars, then, if that'll make you happy!"

Sam looked as if she considered it.

"Don't take such a low offer. You're supposed to barter!" Martouf said. He turned to O'Neill. "4000 dollars. Each."

"You're crazy!" He rolled his eyes. "You don't even know what our money is worth. Oh, well. 800 dollars. That's my last offer - and that's only because you don't have any toys right now!"

"Is it not easier simply to agree to their wishes? As Major Carter mentioned, your military spend much larger amounts of currency without much consideration. It would likely make little difference to them if you spend 5000 dollars instead of 500 for each child." Teal'c pointed out.

"You don't know them like I do! They'll squabble endlessly, complain and whine..." O'Neill suddenly smiled. "2000 dollars each. How does that sound?"

"We accept!" Daniel quickly said, excitedly.

"Finally! I'll just sit here and wait while you find your stuff." He sat down on a bench, beside a rack with rows and rows of computer games.

"I shall keep you company." Teal'c said, sitting down on a chair in front of a computer monitor. There was a game controller on the table. A child that had been on the way there looked at him with annoyance. He had obviously wanted to play the game. Teal'c raised an eyebrow and looked coldly at him. The child left, looking downcast.

Teal'c studied the game running on the screen with interest, then picked up the controller and began pressing buttons. Soon he handed O'Neill the other controller and they began playing.

Janet smiled at them, then left to stroll around, looking at the aisles and trying to keep an eye on the children, who were running all over the store, happily giggling.

"Wow! Look at this!" Sam made a small jump in happiness, then pulled a large box down from the shelf.

"What is it?" Martouf wanted to know.

"It's LEGO Technic! I didn't have this when I was a kid - it was new and Dad thought it was too ex...expensive!"

"You are a kid." Daniel pointed out.

"Yeah, well, the first time, you know..." Sam grinned a little sheepishly. "Anyway, with this you can build anything...and adding this..." She grabbed another box, labeled 'Mindstorms'. "I can build programmable, moving stuff!"

"That's awesome!" Martouf grabbed a couple boxes and added them to their cart.

It was already getting very full. Besides the boxes of LEGO, it contained balls, roller skates, children's scooters, toy weapons, several stuffed animals, dolls, computer games, cartoons, movies, paper, crayons, toy soldiers, radio controlled cars, games, and lots and lots of other things.

"Don't you want some, Daniel?"

"No, I prefer this!" He grabbed a box labeled 'LEGO Adventurers - Scorpion Palace', then spotted a box at the back of the shelf. He put the box in his hands in the cart and climbed the lowest shelf. It held, but made a creaking sound.

Sam and Martouf ran to help him, and he managed to get the large box. Triumphant he studied it.

"LEGO Adventurers - Pharaoh's Forbidden Ruins! I saw this in a store some years ago, but felt...well, I guess I decided it wasn't for grown-ups. Now I can have it! I'm so glad they still had one of'em!"

"And it's cheap too." Sam pointed out. "Only 125 dollars, despite being such a huge box. A bargain. Must be an old left-over." She added, sceptically.

"I don't care! I love it!" Daniel said, clutching the huge box to him.

Lantash, having taken over control from Martouf, studied it carefully.

"That's an Anubis statue...what's up with that?" He scoffed. "You really want a toy with a Goa'uld?" 

"It's educational!" Daniel defended himself.

He put the box in the cart and checked what else was on the back of the shelf. He stuffed a few more boxes into the cart. It was beginning to overflow and he had to stack things very carefully.

"We need another cart." Lantash observed.

Garshaw came towards them, carrying a big fluffy white plush rabbit with a red ribbon tied around its neck.

"Hi! This is Mister Fluffy!" She waved with one of the rabbit's paws and giggled. She gave the toy a hug.

Finally, they pushed two large, very full carts towards the area where O'Neill and Teal'c were waiting. Janet had joined the children and was helping them.

O'Neill and Teal'c had been playing a boxing game - with O'Neill loosing badly. He had not given up, though. However, when he saw the two full carts he jumped up.

"Whoa! Are you crazy?" He looked disbelieving at all the stuff. "That's gotta be toys for much more than 2000 dollars each!"

"Nope!" Sam smiled. "We got good deals! I've got for 1997.96 dollars!" She looked proud.

"1994.26 dollars!" Martouf stated. He bowed his head and gave Lantash control.

"I have toys for 1989.33 dollars."

"Since they didn't use all their allowance, I've gotten for 2009 dollars...or around there..." Daniel looked a little sheepish.

"Wait!" O'Neill stopped them before Yosuuf and Garshaw could say anything. "You both got for 2000 dollars toys? Lantash and Martouf?"

"Yes, of course!" Lantash looked offended.

"Listen, I meant 2000 dollars per kid..." He groaned. "Per entity...no...dammit! You know what I meant!"

"They are two people - both children. It's only fair they each get the same amount of toys as the rest of us." Sam pointed out.

"Or don't you think of me as a real person?" Lantash looked a little sad, but mostly angry.

"That's not what I meant!" He gave Janet and Teal'c a pleading look. Neither said anything. Janet had a clear 'you have to get out of this one on your own' look.

"I never had any toys when I was a kid...the first time. I was just sitting there, in my Jaffa. The whole time! Boring! I want some toys now!" Garshaw stated.

"I didn't have many either! I grew up in a lake! How fun do you think that was? I only got a few toys!" Lantash turned to O'Neill. "Please? Let me have some more now?"
"I'm sure it was one of the reasons I became an evil Goa'uld." Garshaw added. "I changed later, of course, but..."

"I'm feeling slightly evil already!" Lantash tried.

"You can't turn evil." Garshaw scoffed. "Your mommy messed with your head. I had to become good on my own."

"I can cause mischief!" Lantash countered.

"Yes, but you won't...or I'll be disappointed." Janet said, sternly.

Lantash nodded. "Understood."

"I know of many Goa'uld who did not have toys and they all became evil! This proves it! No toys makes you evil." Garshaw continued.

"Listen, Garshaw, even I can see the fault in that logic!" O'Neill groaned. "Carter?"

"Nope! Sounds sound to me!"
O'Neill sighed deeply. He could not handle the thought of having to wait while the children went through the mountain of toys, and picked out those belonging to Lantash and Garshaw. Or listening to the crying and whining he was sure would accompany it. Besides, what they said did make a sort of sense. They were all kids, so he supposed it was only fair they all got toys.

"Okay...okay...what the hell. I guess it's OK. Let's just pay for the damn toys!"

They took the overflowing carts to the very happy looking cashier.

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